


Refugees

by heroiccaptain



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Accidental Cuddling, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Loneliness, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Oblivious, Quest of Erebor, Sleeping Together, Thorin Feels, Understanding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:01:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27162874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heroiccaptain/pseuds/heroiccaptain
Summary: The night allowed them to find comfort in each other and so their words came out naturally, a glimpse of intimacy both of them had spent their lonely lives eager to have.Bilbo and Thorin have their first proper conversation after leaving Rivendell.
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield
Comments: 4
Kudos: 67





	Refugees

They were an afternoon away from Rivendell when an upcoming storm made its first announcement. 

As the sun setted, Thorin's Company managed to find shelter in a dark cave that could fit them all. 

Thorin checked if all of the Company was safe indoors and as all of them had already occupied a place on the ground, he looked for a clear spot for himself.

There was a clear spot. Right next to it, there was a bag with a still folded blanket, one he recognised well. Thorin felt weirdly nervous, like butterflies were flying in his stomach. 

As he put his own bag on the floor, the small figure who had returned for his place appeared, cheeks becoming rosy. 

"Thorin", Bilbo acknowledged respectfully.

"Yes, it's the only place left" 

"That's...alright" 

Bilbo sat timidly, unfolding his blanket as the dwarf laid down as far as he could from the hobbit, closing his eyes. 

The hobbit held the blanket tight, an habit he had acquired from a lifetime of sleeping alone, a subtle way of realising he wanted to be held. 

His mind had been wandering through some dark places. For all he knew, he could die in this quest. It was a dragon, after all. Not just some goblins. He could die in an adventure, yes, but he would never know the unexpected journey of love, would he? 

That thought made his chest tighter. On some nights he felt alone. The last few nights he was feeling more and more gloomy, as another unsettling thought wandered his mind…

_ He doesn't like me. Clearly. He doesn't like me, not even as a friend, imagine if he would- No point in thinking about that, I'm afraid.  _

_ I would like to sleep on his chest. That would be more comfortable than this floor, that's for sure. _

_ Bilbo. Baggins. Sleep!  _

His body moved incessantly under the blanket, trying to adjust to a position that would make him feel at ease.

"Missing your bed, Master Baggins?", Thorin whispered.

"Well, not exactly. I did the same back in Bag End", he stated with a silent pain on his chest. "A bed is not always comfortable, you know" 

"It's better than a cold ground, for what I recall" 

Bilbo moved his body once more, facing the cave ceiling and once or twice, getting a glimpse of the dwarf that talked with his eyes closed. Then, he closed his eyes as well. 

"That it is" 

"I thought Bag End was the place where you feel more comfortable. Your home" 

"It can be, sometimes. At night, on some nights it's...different" 

The night allowed them to find comfort in each other and so their words came out naturally, a glimpse of intimacy both of them had spent their lonely lives eager to have. 

"Different?", the dwarf inquired. 

"Lonely", the silent pain on his chest was a bit louder this time.

Thorin felt a strange sensation of understanding, one he thought he would never encounter, most definitely not with someone who wasn't his kin. "I understand. Before...what happened, I didn't always fall asleep peacefully in Erebor chambers" 

"Oh" 

"Hum?" 

"Nothing. I just, I thought that back then you, well, I've read some tales about kingdoms. Princes and princesses falling in love with each other" 

"I was not, hum, that kind of prince"

"I see", he stated confusedly. "Never thought palace chambers could be lonely. In my imagination they seem so warm", Bilbo smiled, unconsciousness beginning to reach him.

Thorin let go a shy smile as well. "You have quite an imagination, Master Baggins. Perhaps you've been reading too many of those...romantic books" 

"Hum, perhaps. It's an escape, really. To read those tales about reciprocated love, companionship, warm chambers. At night, I just hug my blanket and try to sleep until it's the next day and I have distractions to occupy my mind, you know? It's fine, even when I'm in a gloomy mood. It'll be fine" 

Thorin felt his own silent pain on his chest more greatly. One that had been tickled by annoying thoughts since the night he met the halfling. "I know what you mean. I feel the same" 

They had more in common than he had realised before. Thorin had been so used to being judged roughly he kept a shield to protect himself from others sneers and misjudgements. It was funny, really. With the halfling, this ‘grocer’ he had already regretted calling, he didn't need an armour. He could feel no pressure coming from him. He wasn't judged by his past or by his family. The halfling seemed to accept him as he was. To understand what he was. 

"They're wrong, you know?" 

"Hum?", his line of thoughts was interrupted by Bilbo's half asleep comment. 

"Elrond and Gandalf. They're wrong about you" 

It was like he could read his mind. Thorin's chest was filled with curiosity. "And how do you know that, Master Baggins?" 

"I just do. They tend to think each one is a reflection of someone else in their family, good and bad. We're not. We're our own. At least we have that, even if we don't have much. Being ourselves" 

Thorin wiped a single tear that rolled down through his cheek. "Thank you", he whispered but wasn't sure if the hobbit listened before falling asleep. 

Thorin's mind continued to wander. He thought of their talk, the first proper one since they have met. The first without a wizard and other dwarves lurking around. He remembered the lonely nights in Erebor, the loneliest ones after the tragedy. Not having where to go, his heart an eternal refugee without shelter. 

He thought about Bilbo's words. He could tell he knew loneliness, as he did. Different kinds of loneliness, but still. The same silent pain on their chests, eager or skeptical about finding the one who would bring more warmth to their lives. 

He seemed to have misjudged the halfling. 

_Will I ever have the chance to admit it?_ _Will he ever know?_

A touch on his arm gave him shivers. His eyebrow was raised in suspicion. Slowly, he opened his eyes and checked Bilbo was closer. 

He closed his eyes. Suddenly, he felt another touch. Bilbo's head was resting lightly on his chest. The halfling was completely unconscious, unaware of the thunderstorm of feelings he was causing. 

Inhaling and exhaling. Thorin could sense Bilbo's breath, the little tilts his head made when sleeping. His nose brushing against his clothes, so close to his neck. 

The dwarf didn't know what to do.

"Master Baggins", he says, nervously. He had never held someone in his arms before. Not feeling like  _ this _ . 

What would others think? He couldn't be holding the halfling, not when anyone could see them. 

He wanted to. Bilbo's head feels so light, so right on his chest. His body cuddling so gently. Could the hobbit feel what he felt, that, even unconsciously, his feelings were expressed? 

He knew it didn't happen before. He had watched him sleep from afar, next to the other dwarfs. Bilbo didn't seem eager to cuddle anyone. Only one in particular, so it seems. 

The halfling doesn't move. "Hum, Bilbo", he tries one more time, wanting to touch his shoulder, but unaware of what he should be doing. He wasn't prepared for this! 

"Bilbo"

"Hum?", the hobbit acquires a bit of conscience. "Oh", he moves swiftly and embarrassingly. "I-, I'm sorry. I-, I'm so sorry" 

Quietly, he pulls his blanket and lays down facing Thorin's opposite side. A few tears roll down his face. He feels the pain on his chest, a contrast to the comfort he unconsciously searched for in Thorin's arms. In Thorin's warmth, the warmth he had been dreaming about so many times...

_ Stupid, so stupid. Now he won't ever speak to me again. Such a fool!  _

Thorin doesn't say a word. Instead, he stares at the hobbit, feeling the rejection he must have felt. It's not right. He wants to tell him he wasn't rejected, on the contrary. He was so well appreciated. Even if Thorin can’t understand his own feelings...yet. 

"Bilbo", he whispers, "turn to this side. It's more comfortable"

"I'm fine" 

"Please", Thorin begs tenderly. 

He does, although the embarrassment on his face is still showing. He doesn't try to look at Thorin, he can't even open his eyes with all the embarrassment he's feeling. He covers his face with the blanket as he switches his body. 

A couple minutes goes by and the inevitable happens one more time. Bilbo's body finds its way to Thorin's, which was noticeably closer than the moment they first laid down.

The dwarf inhales deeply, feeling the tension vanishing his shoulders as he exhales. It seems like the halfling would always find his way back to him. Only to him. 

Finally, Thorin places a hand on top of Bilbo's back, allowing him, allowing both of them to rest in each other's company. Holding Bilbo and being held. 

They were both loners, starting to know each other amidst the storms and conquers. Starting to allow themselves to say and feel what has been kept. 

For them, love wasn't a victory march. 

Love was a shelter and on that night, they were refugees. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Comments and kudos are always very much appreciated! Feel free to let me know your reactions!


End file.
